This Is How You Give Too Much In Your Relationship, And This is How You Can Change It

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You already know you can't have them. I used to believe that was a light switch. Are you and this person in a relationship? You may have love for someone forever.

Only when you are alone do you realize how critical it is to have someone else on your side supporting you. If you continue on this vein, your man will likely see you as a dotting mother type rather than the goddess of love you wish to be. You brought your walls down, and in came the army.

What do I do if I love someone so much?

If you are anything like a large number of women, your guy is the center of your universe. Your thoughts revolve around him, your day punctuated by his smiles and your worth determined by how satisfied he is with all that you do to make him happy. You pour love into the relationship hoping that every ounce you give will come back to you as appreciation. And because your love fuels him, he shines like the sun. Even when his plans supersede yours, his work is deemed more important, and his words hold more weight, at the end of the day you don't mind because after all — you love him. Is it possible to love someone too much. Many women equate loving a man with perpetual giving, submitting and acquiescing. A woman seems to have an endless supply of love to give to others, but little to give to herself. She tends to submit thinking her role is to support rather than to direct and will acquiesce her power in the relationship to help her man feel more powerful and remain dominant. A woman's identity is dependent on proving her love, while a man's identity is more defined by how well he provides. A woman feels fulfilled when she is doing everything she can to make her man happy. She seldom realizes how little she gets in return. Fluffing his pillow or spending hours in the kitchen fixing his favorite meal won't cure his woes. But doing everything for him what to do when you love someone so much he is a cripple and is demeaning. If you continue on this vein, your man will likely see you as a dotting mother type rather than the goddess of love you wish to be. Women often feel overly responsible for their men's wounds and moods, thinking that they in someway caused them. In their eyes, they must have done something wrong to cause him to slip into silence. A woman, therefore, sees it as her duty to nurture him into a mood change. In this case a woman's love is tainted by her shame. After all, the sun shines brightest and the moon only glows because of the sun. For centuries, women have been trained and conditioned to believe a man's intelligence is superior. This conditioned belief is difficult to shake even for the most liberated and accomplished woman. If you are the type to put your guy on a high mountain, thinking he is more intelligent, capable and ultimately more important, all that admiration will make you look pathetic. Your adoration will likely only fuel an already too big ego and does little to elevate your self-worth. If you are the type to only contact friends when your mate isn't home or hang up the phone abruptly when he comes through the door, your friends are probably annoyed by your rude behavior. A woman's friendships outside of her relationship feed and reward her. And in times when things aren't running smoothly in her relationship, good friends offer support and advice. Maybe the reason why you sacrifice your goals to encourage his is because you believe he deserves success more than you or because deep inside you don't believe in yourself. If you put your personal goals on the backburner too long, your dreams will simmer away. He will only lose respect for you and complain even more. It is not uncommon for a woman to side with her mate even if she knows he's wrong, support poor decisions or refrain from giving advice thinking she is proving her love and faith in him by keeping silent. If you find yourself the one to always say you are sorry first, taking the brunt of the blame for all arguments, you will lose self-respect. Sure, what to do when you love someone so much may believe it is easier just to let him think he's won, but he has lost something valuable too — his respect for you. But thinking a man has love on his mind when he pushing or coercing her to have sex when she isn't the least bit in the mood is not lovemaking. Letting a man have his way with you doesn't honor the sacredness of true intimacy. You will likely feel used and even abused if after countless times of saying no you ultimately submit. Sex is an expression of love, not a duty. You pick out clothing donated to the thrift store and buy it with the change you had to dig out of the bottom of your purse. To make matters worse you just can't help bringing him home a little something from time to time. Women who are in the practice of indulging their mates while denying themselves feel undeserving. They appear vicariously gratified just knowing their mate has it all. Just seeing him happy is enough for her. Inviting his best friend to camp out in your living room for a month because he was thrown out of his home for being a slob or bringing home two stray dogs to be your companions while he's away all day, should push you to set some limits. But you just don't have the heart to tell him you don't appreciate the thought and extra work. No, you don't want him to think you are an ogre. But if you constantly dismantle your boundaries to accommodate your partner's soft heart, your own heart will be filled with resentment. Loving someone means you respect him enough to set boundaries, expect that he treat you with respect and gives to you in as many meaningful ways as you give to him. A woman may have to fight her own tendencies to submit and sacrifice in the name of love. If it's love that she is after, then she will have to love herself enough to ask for what she needs and stop giving endlessly thinking it wins her a place in his heart. Need additional insight on whether you should love him or leave him?.

If it's a friendship, simply thank them for being who they are and showing up for you when you needed it the most. Remember, you are always provided for. In contrast, when you are smothering him, you prioritize your own needs for closeness or connection, as opposed to what the other person wants or needs. There is always something you can thank someone for. It has been something that was ingrained in my spirit since I was a small child. Both of my kids and grandkids do this to me as well. We associate our sense of well-being with the presence of our loved one. After some time they will ease. Answer I was trying to tell my boyfriend I loved him, but was afraid Iwould scare him. Maybe the reason why you sacrifice your goals to encourage his is because you believe he deserves success more than you or because deep inside you don't believe in yourself. Never give hope on anyone, miracles happen everyday.